Category Archives: homeschool

Memories of the Baptism

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Momma friends- keep the main thing the main thing! Jesus first!

Remember your little ones are like a flower bed. You need to sow good seed into them and tend their little hearts as they grow. If you do, you will see good fruit.
You cannot give them what you don’t already have. If you want your babies to know God you have to live that in front of them. You may have a great heritage passed down from your Parents or Grandma and Grandpa. But if we do not take that heritage of knowing God and make it our own it will mean nothing in our lives. Relationship with God is not something you inherit from someone. It is something you have on your own personally.

“Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.”
‭‭Galatians‬ ‭6‬:‭9‬ ‭NIV‬‬

This is what I wrote on Facebook 9 years ago, the day of my youngest sons baptism:

“I have no greater joy than to hear that my children are walking in the truth.” 1 Peter 1:4


While holding my oldest son as an infant, I can remember as a young mother looking at the baby God had blessed me with, and praying with all urgency that God would mark his heart, that at a young age God would speak to him, and that he would serve God with all his heart for all his days. I have prayed this same prayer over each of my children at different times. I have walked into their rooms at night just to watch them sleeping and found myself kneeling besides their bed asking God to keep their hearts close to Him. That God would speak to them, and draw them to Himself and place a call on their lives. A prayer that at the time seemed kind of scary because God could call them all into missions and send them continents away from me, but whatever He wants for them is what I want for them.
God has given me the privilege of praying with each of my kids to ask Jesus into their hearts, each of them at very young ages: 5 years, 4 years, 5 years, 4 years. At times I thought they seem so young, God if they don’t understand please continue to work in them and draw them close to you.
Today marks a special event in the life of my youngest son. With a sense of urgency he has been asking over and over to be baptized. He told me the other night he heard the Holy Spirit tell him he needed to be baptized again. Years ago we allowed him to be baptized at the age of 5 because he asked and asked to be baptized then. When pondering if this was a good idea to let him be baptized so young, I continually heard the verse of Jesus saying, “Let the little children come to me.” over and over in my head. My husband and I decided to let him knowing that at an older age he may want to be baptized again.
I am humbled on how faithful God has been to fulfill my deepest desire as a mom, that my children would have a real relationship with Jesus, not just one that is based on the relationship my husband and I have with God, one of their own.
Wednesday night I made it late to church. My youngest had a flag football game. As soon as it was over, he looked at me and said, “Let’s go! How much of church do you think we missed?” He loves playing football, but he loves going to church more. He wasn’t too thrilled that the games were on Wednesday night, but it is what it is. As I walked into the room where the youth group was being held, my youngest daughter was thoroughly involved in worship, eyes closed, hands raised. My older daughter was singing and playing the piano in worship to God. Then my oldest son, 19 years old, paused his singing, and with an urgency about him talked about how worship was a special time that God had created us for. How God wants more of us. It struck me how he no longer talked like a kid, but as a man, a man of God. I thought about those times besides his bedside praying for God to mark his heart. I thought about my daughters and the conversations we have had lately about God and living for him. I thought about my baby boy, even though he is 10 years old, joking with me this week that he is going to be president some day, if not that then a preacher, maybe both.
This morning my heart is full. God has allowed me to have the privilege to sow seeds into the hearts of my kids, and I am getting to see just a little of the fruit from it. There is nothing greater than seeing your kids walking in the truth no matter where God may lead them. They are His. May His gifting and calling on each of their lives be fulfilled. I am one blessed momma.

The Journey (originally written February 20th, 2013)

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“So how long are you planning on homeschooling your kids?” That was a question I would hear quite frequently when the kids were little. Usually I would reply with a polite, “I don’t know. As long as God wants me to I guess.” “Will you homeschool all the way through high school?” “That’s another good question I don’t know.” Now I sit here about 12 years later getting ready to graduate my first Senior, having a Freshman, junior high schooler, and an elementary level student.

My favorite photo of our homeschool years.

My heart is pretty full this morning thinking now blessed I am and how would not trade this journey I have been on for anything. I have homeschooled my kids through fun times and hard ones: Pregnancy, nursing, toddlerhood, miscarriage, devastating family sickness, a husband on shift work, etc… life. But this journey, though at times, trying, has been one of the joys of my life. Because I have had an abundance of hugs, kisses, laughter, and fun with 4 of my my most favorite people on the planet, next to my handsome husband. We have explored the wonders of a turtle caught in the yard, the reality of gravity as mom rolls down the hill and falls into the creek on a nature hike, how cool it is to mummify a chicken and build it a sarcophagus out of a shoe box, what kind of toads are we really catching at night around our house, meteor showers on a school night when we should be in bed, building a front deck on the house for some shop hours, music lessons, dance lessons, t-ball, flag football, swim lessons, 4 H, choir, Awanas, Bible stories, the list goes on and on. I have shared a significant part of my journey with some of the most adventurous people I know and I have loved it!

About 10 years ago, I was contemplating how much I desperately wanted my kids to know Jesus. Not just know about Him. I was reading Galatians 6:9 “Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.” I thought about 1 Corinthians 9:10 “Now He supplies seed to the sower and bread for food will also supply and increase your store of seed and enlarge the harvest of your righteousness.” At times on this journey I have felt like my seed bag for sowing into my kids had a giant hole and leaked every bit of patience, joy, and peace out of it, but I was reminded that this is not about ME at all. God is the one who supplies seed to the sower and as I obey Him. He will bring the harvest. He loves my kids way more than I do and He wants them to know Him more than I do. What I used to tell Aaron when he was 3 is more true than I ever knew at the time. I would ask him: “Who loves you Aaron?”. “You do Mommy.” “Who loves you more?” “Jesus”. “Right!” God loves them more! With that assurance, how can we fail. “If God is for us, who can be against us?”

Two days ago I sat in Aaron’s scholarship audition at Evangel and watched as my little boy, now a young man did something I would have never had the guts or talent to do. Whether or not he gets the scholarship, whether or not he goes to Evangel or Moberly Area Community College, I felt a sense of amazement. What was started 13 years ago with a kindergartner who couldn’t sit still for 15 minutes straight to do his phonics has now came to this a confident young man who is willing to work hard for something he wants to do. God’s word is true: He supplies the seed. He gives us strength to sow. He brings out a harvest, and He gives us Joy as we work.

On this Journey that started 13 years ago, I still have about another 9 years for me to go. Many more adventures. Many more seeds to sow that God will give me as I work my field. Harvests to see come forth that will bless me. I am thankful I started this road and I am blessed that God has taken me on this Journey. I would not trade it for anything.

Finished the Race- Retirement of a Sentimental Homeschool Mom

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“ I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race…” 2 Timothy 4:7

One of the many school days. Me and my baby, Andy, Graduating this year Class of 2022

When you’re a writer, you write. I’ve been at this for a while. It’s probably the best way to sort out what’s going on on the inside of me. The other day I was digging through one of my MANY 1/2 finished journals and stumbled upon this entry.

Journal Entry 8/29/2007

The above journal entry must have been right before I started a new school year. I was calculating the cost that day, and I’m pretty sure I must have been overwhelmed. My baby would have been almost 3 1/2, youngest daughter – 7, older daughter -9, and oldest-13. As I have told many, I have no business teaching math, I was a little off on my calculation for graduation of Andy- the baby, it is this year, in fact, it’s less than a week away.

First graduate class of 2013 First born Aaron.

I did it! It’s almost a done deal. The verse in 2 Timothy 4 has been running through my mind. Paul was finishing up his race on earth., and I’m not planning on going anywhere soon i.e. dying… but as far as the homeschooling season of my life, all 22 years of it, “I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race…” It’s really been hard for me to believe it is true. Although, this past year, has had relatively little homeschooling for me, since Andy took some classes at a small private school for dual credit, it signals the end of the homeschooling season for me.

Daughter #1 -Laura Class of 2016 with little sister.

Years ago, when all this started up, someone asked me how long I was planning on homeschooling my kids. I told them that I had no idea. It would be as long as God gave me the ability to do it, and I am glad that He did give me the grace for 22 years. I knew in my heart that God had called me to homeschool my kids, but I have lived with self-doubt of my abilities to teach my kids the entire time. I have had a nagging voice telling me how I was “Screwing them up” whispering in my ear frequently. I have woken up many mornings thinking about how I needed to figure out how to get the school bus to pick up my kids. But in the end after all my self-doubt, fears, and thoughts of quitting, I would not change the past 22 years for anything in the world. In fact, being at home with my kids since July 1995 when my first born came home from the hospital has been the joy of my life and I am thankful that God gave me the opportunity to do just that. I’ve often told my kids the reason I wanted to stay home and then homeschool was that I wanted to see all their firsts: Their first steps, their first words, their first word’s read, their first field trip, their first dance, and oh yes, their first time driving on a road with a permit… so many firsts. All this culminating with being able to stand on a stage in front of friends and family and hand their diploma to them personally as their teacher K-12.

Daughter #2 Faith class of 2018

I want to attest to you, that completing the past 22 years is not something that I did in my own strength. I finished the above journal entry on the next page with these two sentences, “Who else have I got besides you God? If I don’t trust, what can I do?” If you only knew me, you would understand how much I have needed Him the past 22 years. In fact, looking at the future, I still see how much I need Him for the next 49 of whatever He has for me to be about. It’s a little disconcerting to find yourself done with the one thing you have focused so much attention on for so long. I’ve found myself tearing up more than once the past couple of weeks contemplating it all. I’ve got things to be about, but honestly, I feel a little lost. Who I have been for the past 22 years is a “homeschool mom”. Now I’m not 100 % sure who I am supposed to be. I’ve got some ideas, but just like it was 22 years ago, when I think of what that means for me to be about it, I find myself shaking in my boots again, thinking about how unqualified I am, self doubt, and the old familiar “you will definitely screw that up…” So I guess I’m on the right track. lol. Because once again I find myself needing to write in a journal for 5/15/2022. “Who else have I got besides you God? If I don’t trust, what can I do?”

A week away from Graduation

The Deep (poem 2006)

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“Busted!!”

Years ago, when I was smack dab in the middle of the years, I spent homeschooling my four kids, we started our day with a daily devotion. I would read a story or two from the “Egermeiers Bible Story Book” then we would talk about it. One day I was describing to the best of my finite capabilities the Greatness of God. I told my kids; God is like an ocean you can explore. You think you have seen it all and there is soooo much more out there of Him.” As soon as I spoke those words, I felt the Holy Spirit say, “Yes, and you are content to just dip your toes while sitting on the edge of the shoreline of ME”. “Busted!!”

This morning as I have been praying and reading my Bible the Song “Rest on Us” by Maverick City Music has been going through my mind. Actually, this started yesterday in my living room, while cleaning. This song came on and I was captivated by its words. (Gotta love a time of living room worship 😉) 

Rest on Us
"Come down
Spirit, when You move, You make my heart pound
When You fill the room
You're here and I know You are moving
I'm here and I know You will fill me
'Cause You love to meet us here
He-hey, baptize us afresh tonight
Baptize us afresh tonight"

God is an experiencial God. He wants us to feel Him. Case in Point: Thomas and Jesus after the resurrection. “Jesus came and stood among them and said, “Peace be with you!” 27 Then he said to Thomas, “Put your finger here; see my hands. Reach out your hand and put it into my side. Stop doubting and believe.” John 20:26-27. Acts 2 is definitely an account of the disciples experiencing God. The Holy Spirit comes, people hear the sound of a “mighty rushing wind”, the disciples feel joy, so much so that the people around think they are drunk. Acts 2:15. God talks about in His word that we are to “TASTE and SEE that the Lord is good.” Psalm 34:8. Sounds like an experience to me… The cool thing about God is that He’s not about just one good experience of Him, then endure til Heaven. He desires a vibrant, living relationship with us on the daily! BUT so often I find myself like I was telling my kids that school day long ago, “Dangling my toes on the edge of the ocean of God’s Goodness!” AND He is inviting me to SOOOOO much more!

His desire is for us to dive in and to explore the depths of HIs love, His Joy, His Peace, His Patience, His Kindness, His Goodness, His Self-Control! The question is “Will I dive in?” “Will I explore the depths of His love and His wisdom in HIs Word?” The invitation has been sent out. His depths are calling out to the deep. 

"Deep calls to deep
  in the roar of your waterfalls;
  all your waves and breakers
  have swept over me."
  Psalm 42:7 NIV

Proof that this pursuit is not a onetime occurrence, but a lifetime endeavor of seeking Him, searching out His word, communion/ experiencing His Spirit’s presence.

Years ago, February 4, 2006, to be exact I was contemplating all this and I wrote a Poem 

The Deep (written 2/4/2006) 
I can't go deep enough when i dive into You.
I think I arrive, but the hunger returns. 
Your deep calls to deep and I am moved. 
I follow You on and chase after You. 

My heart cries out. "How long until I am consumed?" 
You alone I desire. You alone satisfy. 
"Fill me with you:" Is my hearts Cry.

Just one taste will NEVER satisfy! More of Jesus! More of the Holy Spirit filling us to the overflowing!

¡Conocerlo y Darlo a Conocer!: To Know Him and To Make Him Known!

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Our mission: To Know Him and Make Him Known!

When I was in college, I went on two short term mission trips with YWAM (Youth With a Mission) to Juarez, Mexico and also Creel, Mexico near the Copper Canyon where the Tarahumara Indians live. It was life changing. I loved the culture and the people (still do). At that time in my life, I had plans of finishing school, I was majoring in Spanish, and then joining YWAM full time, working in Mexico or possibly Guatemala. Of course, I… had plans… God had other ones. Long story, but here I am a 51 year old, mother of 4, homeschool mom for 22 years, grandma, and housewife for almost 27 years. Definitely not a foreign country missionary.

One of the phrases that has stuck out with me through the years from the trips I made besides the Spanish name for YWAM, Juventude Con una Mision, is “Conocerlo y Darlo a Conocer”- “To Know Him and to Make Him Known”. My first trip to Mexico was with a youth group from a church near my hometown. I was sponsored by some of the leaders of that youth group. It was for a week. It was awesome! My second mission trip signed up for a “Summer of Service” which was a 3-week trip. I boarded a plane to El Paso, by myself (20 years old) and went with a group that I knew no one. I ended up with a group of kids from another youth group. Some of the kids, were obviously not into missions, more into drama… So we spent the first few days on the El Paso side of the border trying to get our attitudes right. We were cleaning ministry buildings, and basically working on tasks that were sweaty and unenjoyable like moving boxes that had cock roaches under them that were big enough you could put a leash on and take for a walk. YUCK! Then when we finally got to cross the border, we ended up cleaning up a goat pen for one of our first major projects. It was good, but kind of a bummer for someone who had worked hard at raising money, and had visions of “getting a little taste of the glory” while in another country.

The Cooks for the Mission team. Leticia and me.

On my second trip, word got out that I was a cook at a nursing home, back in the states. So, I got put on the kitchen crew, another blow to my ego. Since I was cooking all the time as my job at home…Ha ha. When we went down further south into Mexico, I was one of the two cooks for the whole team. At the time, I was thinking, “this isn’t so glorious”. Cooking on wood stoves in a kitchen with a skirt on (almost caught it on fire), with a bunch of Mexican ladies that I could barely communicate with. For some reason I had not learned the word for “Spoon” in my Spanish lessons. You should have seen them laughing at me while I was telling them in Spanish “I need a thing that does this” making wild stirring motions. ha ha Looking back, it was perfect, and I would not change anything in those experiences for the world.

The wood stove, the skirt that almost caught on fire and me 😊

Then there was sleeping on a concrete floor of a church (we were helping to build) with only a sleeping bag. Experiencing Montezuma’s revenge (diarrhea) after eating vegetables that were washed with local water. Everyone on the team using the same outhouse while having the diarrhea as well (Words cannot describe the smell). “Showering” using a barrel and a scoop. All this, to “¡Conocerlo y Darlo a Conocer!”. “Know Him and Make Him Known”.

I’ve mentioned before that I was given a bracelet at a Skillet concert recently. When I put it on, something on it deeply resonated within me. It says, “Make Me Like Jesus”. “Yes Lord, that is all I want, ‘Make me like Jesus'”. Here lately, when I look at it, a question comes up in my mind. “What would Jesus be like in this….?” The answers are challenging. Jesus would be patient. Jesus would forgive. Jesus would give himself away… etc. It’s having the same affect on me that the 20 year old Janet experienced 21 years ago in Mexico. Humbling to see how far away from Christlike I can be…

Life is not always what I expect it to be. Sometimes it can be somewhat “mundane”, lacking excitement, dull. But God is far from mundane. He is beyond all the expectations I have. That is why in the daily, mundane tasks of life, even sometimes the gross tasks…, my aim should always be simply “to know Him” and with what I learn of Him, “make Him known”. Had the mission team I was on back in the early 90’s not been there for the mundane.working on projects, helping the full time missionaries, we would have missed our chance to help an elderly missionary make it to the local hospital in the dead of night while having a health issue, a very dangerous drive through the mountains of Mexico. We also would have missed being able to pick up a young Mexican mother along the way who was in labor and rush her along to the hospital as well. Believe me, that was a hair raising, exciting story. Had I missed the mundane times in motherhood, I would have missed the excitement of getting to pray with each of my children to ask Jesus in their heart. I would have missed the deep conversations on faith that have shaped them and quite honestly myself. Had I missed the mundane tasks of going to the grocery store, paying bills, cleaning house, etc. I would have missed the excitement of having friends over for an evening of food, fellowship, worship in our living room, and prayer. All the seemingly mundane of the world, when set apart by the constant companionship of Jesus through prayer and worship, (while driving, folding clothes, doing dishes, etc.) suddenly becomes a Holy time. It prepares us for that opportunity to come where I am able to “make Him known”. Whether it be in conversation with a friend, giving to a stranger, or helping someone in need. That is what Jesus would be like. Make me like HIM!!

¡Conocerlo y Darlo a Conocer!

The Chisel, The Potter,and Sir Isaac Newton

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“Yet you, LORD, are our Father. We are the clay, you are the potter; we are all the work of your hand.” Isaiah 64:8

One of the grand things about homeschooling, especially through High School, is you GET to revisit subjects that you probably would have desired to never revisit back when you went through them in High School and College, Such as Algebra. I am not a fan of that subject… Then there’s the occasional grammar rule or scientific law that rolls through your brain just because it’s there and freshly stirred up. Which is what happened to me this morning.

I’m trying to get back in the habit of watching the sunrise as often as I can before Winter sets in here in my neck of the woods. This morning I got out on the deck pretty early so I found myself watching the dark outlines of the trees gently being blown by the wind. Then low and behold Newton’s First Law of Motion- the law of inertia pops into my mind. “An object at rest stays at rest and an object in motion stays in motion with the same speed and in the same direction unless acted upon by an unbalanced force.” If you know me, THAT is not something that I sit around and ponder on the regular… BUT the images of the physics experiments with a marble being rolled on my hard wood floors vrs. it being rolled on carpet comes to mind. Plus rolling it and then touching it on the side so it moves in a different trajectory. The inner nerd has been unleashed…

It occurred to me as I was pondering Newton’s law that there really is a spiritual application to all that knowledge I had deemed as useless for my purposes in High School. I can’t tell you how many times I have found my life, my spiritual marble, rolling along the right direction . Then it is acted upon by an outside force, situation, relationship, etc. that knocks it the wrong direction. THEN, the sometimes seemingly unpleasant, redirection by another outside force, God, to get me back on track again. It occurred to me that the marble may not always appreciate it’s course correction after it gets used to going the direction it was set off on, and sometimes the application of that force isn’t pleasant. Kind of like Colonoscopy prep, necessary, but not pleasant at all. ( a whole other blog I’m sure will be coming soon to an electronic device near you… Thank you “50th Birthday” for me). Or the course correction could be related to God simply wanting us to go a new direction. We did all we could where we were. Time to move on. Still unpleasant if you’re not a fan of change, but in the end GOOD, because God’s plans and trajectory for our life is ALWAYS for our Good and for His glory. My role in being set in motion then having a course correction is to submit. To agree with God that wherever He desires to set my course is the direction I want to go, and if the process of getting there is difficult, I must trust that My Shepherd- Jesus knows exactly where I need to be and how He wants me to get there, obedience/ yielding. That kind of stuff.

The Skit Guys have a video on YouTube called “The Chisel” well worth the watch. It talks about how we are God’s masterpiece and how God wants to shape us to be someone He can be close to and someone He can use. God applying His touch/ force to our lives so we can be what He desired for us to be all along. His Beautiful Masterpiece.

All this being said, I’m reminded of a poem I wrote 10 years ago during the difficult season of my Father in Law’s cancer and then death. I pictured the world spinning as the Potter’s wheel for me. Day in Day out it spins and day in day out God molds and shapes me, applies His force to the areas that I need changed, all with the goal of me being the “masterpiece” He wants me to be. Whether it’s The Chisel, The Potter’s Wheel, or Newton’s First Law of Motion that drives the point home in my heart. I find great comfort today knowing that the God who sees me is the same God who takes the time to Touch and rearrange things in my life so the things between us Fall away and I am able to move in close to Him, the Lover of my Soul. 

Life on the Potter's Wheel (April 2011)


Life on this Potter's Wheel
Is sometimes not fun at all
The tools You use to shape me
Dig deep as unholy falls.
You mold me and shape me
As I am sitting very still
My world seems unsettled
As I am turning on this Potter's Wheel
Trusting and accepting
What You are making me to be
Is the crux of the battle
As I sit here while You're molding me.
In the Hands of the Potter
Is the safest place I can be
He knows what He's doing
Even when I can barely see.
Your strength and Your wisdom
Is making me what I should be.
I am thankful and comforted
As Your hands are molding me.

Testify

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John 16:33 “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”

(Ugliest couch on the planet. The source of many fights on the way to church about how we needed a new one but couldn’t go into debt to get one. Thank God for the lazy boy recliner couch we have today. (Paid cash 😉) )

Our local church started their Sunday School classes up again today, something that COVID had put on hold for almost a year now. The lesson was on Sarah, Abraham and the angelic visit/ announcement of the coming supernatural pregnancy and birth of Isaac to a couple who were well past their 80’s. Sarah’s once laughed about possibility became her provision from God with laughter of joy brought to a heart sadden by infertility for years. A promise that looked to be forgotten, realized in God’s miraculous timing and in God’s miraculous ways. In the teaching I was reminded of God’s miraculous provision and God’s miraculous ways in my own life.

(One of our first cars. Used car made up of 2 different cars but so very dependable. I was just happy it had air conditioning,Car before that one didn’t. We’re driving a 2016 Jeep Wrangler now that we purchased because it’s just plain “fun to drive” )

It’s easy to forget, sometimes, the good things that God has done, especially in seasons of difficulty. I’ve spent many times writing in this blog about God walking with me in difficulty either of circumstance or of mind (my thought life). But I neglect to every once in a while just lay out the testimony of God’s Goodness to me in my life. Because the truth of the matter is, without the Goodness of God towards me where would I be? Not anywhere near where I am now. Though I have had trials, I have also had a blessed life, and I would do good to give thanks for that daily, hourly or more. Fixing my eyes on the One who is always with me and does cause all things (the hard, sad, and bad included) to work out for my good. Because I love God and am called according to His purpose. (Romans 8:28) The truth of the matter is He is no respector of persons and He is more than able to do that for you as well. Paul sums life up pretty well when he said “I know what it means to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty…” Philippians 4:12 We all get a taste of a little of both at times. The problem I have is my “squeaky wheel gets the oil”, or I tend to see the things I’m going through and tend to, wallow in the disappointment. Then I forget…

(First house- 1 bathroom, 3 kids (at the time)
We Ended up in a much bigger house with 4 bathrooms for our growing family of 4 kids. Got it for $85000 less than the owners originals asking price at an auction a huge blessing. We couldn’t have afforded it if we had to pay what it was really worth. )

Sarah in the Bible probably did the same thing. Years of waiting, wanting, crying, pleading, heart break… Only to find herself way on the other side of the childbearing years with a promise reminded and then fulfilled. When she laughed at the promise from her heavenly visitors, God didn’t say, “Well… you missed your chance. I’ll show you for laughing at me…” Instead He blew her mind and Abraham’s too with a fulfillment so outrageous, laughing for Joy while holding their son would be the only appropriate response. And here’s the deal… God didn’t just do that yesterday for them. He has done it today for us. He doesn’t change and He’s not surprised by my own struggles to take Him at His word at times. I think He gets a kick out of blowing my mind too. Because in that moment, I testify. I tell of His goodness that has brought me to a place of blessing. I tell of His presence that never leaves me alone in my time of need. I tell of how God took a small town Missouri girl, Gave her a smoking hot husband 😍, four kids, a grandson, a nice home, a Jeep and a good life. Not a life absent from trouble. But a life that is abundant with His grace, joy, peace, and freedom in the midst of the good, the bad, the ugly, and the beautiful. God is good! Let me testify!

(My youngest 17 years ago. Breathing troubles when born ended up in the NICU for 7 days. Turned out it was just acid reflux. i.e. (God took care of him) He’s a 6 ft tall rugby playing, drummer, lifeguard, Junior in High School. Healthy and strong 😉)
(Family 2021. Together on Easter Sunday. Attending church celebrating the Goodness of our Resurrected Lord)

Wilderness Wandering

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Several years ago me and God had this thing. That may sound a little strange at first, but hear me out. My house has an upstairs deck. It’s not very big, but it’s not easily accessible by my Great Pyrenees, and it faces East. It’s the perfect place to watch the sunrise without getting slobbered on on a beautiful Spring morning. Several years ago it was my spot that I went out on with a cup of coffee and my Bible, sometimes a blanket. I would pray and contemplate God and His goodness over my life. But I got busy… Busy homeschooling teens/ four kids, prepping for my volunteer work at church and in our homeschool community, keeping my house somewhat clean, the troups feed, etc… So even though I still maintained my quiet time or prayer and Bible reading in the morning, my moments of sunrise with Jesus went to the wayside.

As I’ve alluded to before in my blog, I’m in a new season in my life. All the indicators of this new season have been popping up all over: three of my four kids have graduated our homeschool, my oldest is married, my next one is engaged, my third is in college, my fourth is a junior and has a drivers license- never around , I’ve got a grandbaby, and I turned 50. I’ve felt a little lost here recently, a little bit like I’ve been wandering in a wilderness.

Today as I was reading my Bible. I came a cross a few verses that stuck out to me. Jeremiah 31:2-3 “This is what the Lord says: “The people who survive the sword will find favor in the wilderness; I will come to give rest to Israel.” The Lord appeared to us in the past, saying: “I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with unfailing kindness.”” The Message version puts it this way, “They found grace out in the desert(wilderness)…Israel, out looking for a place to rest, met God out looking for them!” Finding grace in the wilderness sounds pretty good to a person that feels like they’ve been wandering around in one here lately, and for a person who has been looking around trying to figure out how to rest, the assurance that God is out looking for me and gives rest freely is awesome.

I think from time to time in my 36 years of walking with the Lord I get myself off track. I forget what I am really seeking and find myself chasing after other stuff. The “other stuff” may not be all that bad, like the busyness of life: Raising a family, feeding the aforementioned family, cleaning house, church committments, community committments… not all bad. Sometimes it takes me waking up in a wilderness to show me I may have gotten a little off track.

The book of Hosea in the Bible is the story of a prophet who marries a prostitute. He loves the prostitute and tries to get her to quit running after her other lovers. It was a living illustration of what Israel was like to God. God loved Israel, and they continually ran after their other lovers, idols. I can see myself in that story too. I find myself too busy chasing other lovers and lose my way to the upper deck for “A Sunrise with Jesus”. Hosea records these words, “Therefore I am now going to allure her; I will lead her into the wilderness and speak tenderly to her.” Hosea 2:14. There are times it takes God leading us out into a spiritual “wilderness” to show us that our other “lovers” are not what will fulfill. The truth of the matter is God is not after all the things I can do… He is after me. He wants my heart, my love, my worship, my time…He wants me.

It hit me today after reading these verses, how much I’ve missed my “Sunrises with Jesus”. I may let my neck of the woods warm up a bit more before I head out the upper deck door, but I need that time to resume. It is in that place I can experience the rest of Jeremiah 31:2-3 I quoted above. “I have loved you with an everlasting love. I have drawn you with unfailing kindness.” God’s love and HIs kindness are revealed to us when we take the time to slow down and “rest” in His presence, when we’re quiet and calm enough to be able to receive what He’s been offering us all along, Himself.

Here Comes the Son (November 2017)

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“I wait for the Lord, my whole being waits, and in his word I put my hope. I wait for the Lord more than watchmen wait for the morning, more than watchmen wait for the morning. Israel, put your hope in the Lord, for with the Lord is unfailing love and with him is full redemption. He himself will redeem Israel from all their sins.”
‭‭Psalm‬ ‭130:5-8‬ ‭NIV‬‬

Last year Andy suckered me into taking him deer hunting on a school morning while his dad was at work. He hadn’t scored a big buck and needed someone who has a Hunters Ed Certificate, which I possess. (Thank you Salem Junior High PE class).
I’m not the deer hunter of the family as you all know, but I bundled up and trekked with him onto the neighboring federal land to the spot recommended by his dad. As we sat there in the dark, the sun began to appear over the horizon. Andy leaned over to me and whispered, “This is the time, when dad and I hunt, that dad quietly sings, “Here comes the sun. Do do do do. Here comes the sun. It’s alright. It’s alright.”” An old Beatles tune makes a memory for a 12 year old kid that I’m sure will stick with him for the rest of his life of him and his dad hunting.
I read the verse above this morning thinking about all the different occasions I’ve awaited the sunrise, trout fishing at Montauk on opening day of trout season, Easter Sunrise Service as a kid at church, watching the sunrise from my deck, etc.
You know it’s coming, it never fails, and when it comes it will be beautiful and usher in the awaited prize you have been waiting on as you sit there patiently awaiting its arrival.
God is as faithful as the sunrise, actually more so. He is worth waiting on. His love never fails and He is full of redemption- setting us free from all that has entangled us and kept us in bondage. It does not matter how dark the night has been. He will come. We can expectantly wait for Him knowing that what He brings as He rises in our lives will be beautiful and oh so good.
So this morning as you may be sitting in the darkness, waiting for a glimmer of hope. Remember, “Here comes the Son. Do do do do. Here as comes the Son. It’s alright. It’s alright.”
Keep watching. He will never fail!

Homeschool Advice for the Newbies

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Just a little word of encouragement for those of you who have young kids you’re schooling this year. I’ve been cleaning out my school room. I don’t need it any more. 3 of my 4 kids have graduated and my youngest is a Junior.
I found this note while cleaning. My daughter, who wrote this, now has an associates degree and works at a bank. She happened to get A’s in all her college English classes. I would have never guessed that to be possible when she gave me this note years ago.
Relax… Enjoy your kids. Homeschooling is so much more than academics. Make sure you major in the important stuff like: time together and teaching them about God. The academics will come.
I cried many a tear over that kid’s spelling and with God’s help and time to grow she’s ok.
Kindergartners Don’t have to read by the end of the year. Two of mine didn’t… 6th graders may not excel in multiplication and division. My oldest son didn’t. He’s married now, has a degree in what he’s good at, music and has a family and a job. So you may end up with a kid that struggles in an area. Don’t we all struggle in an area. 😉
In the end, it will be ok as you just keep going and trust God that He always has a plan.
Happy School Year to you all. Now back to cleaning out the school room. My new season came quicker than I thought it would.