Category Archives: anxiety

Take God At His Word- Faith Devotion written for WOW ministry 3/14/2024

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“Consequently, faith comes from hearing the message, and the message is heard through the word about Christ.” Romans 10:17 NIV

Every day I lived for the next dose of my anxiety pills. For six years, I took them faithfully. Every day was the same: wake up, get a glass of water, take the meds. Then at night: get another glass of water, take the next dose, go to bed. One morning in October 2021 everything changed. That morning, I grabbed my pill box and heard these words deep within my spiritual heart, “This is not your inheritance.” At that moment, I believed that God had different plans for my life. I believed He could provide peace where anxiety had reigned. I stopped Buspar that morning and weaned myself off Prozac within five months. Two years later, I am still living in the peace, love, and joy that my Heavenly Father has generously given to me as a part of His inheritance that I received that day.

This month our WOW verses are about faith. Faith is complete confidence in God – in His character, in His Word, and in His promises. It is complete trust in God believing and being fully assured that He is who He says He is and will do all that He says He will do. God’s Word works a mighty faith in us, a faith that is strong, and able for anything because it is the living Word of God. God’s Word is powerful and does the work of strengthening, establishing, and rooting our faith within us. We hear the Word of God, receive it into our hearts, and God uses His Word to do a work of faith in us. That is because His Word is living and active and powerful to accomplish His will.

Lately, I have been contemplating why the words, “This is not your inheritance.” came to me deep within my spiritual heart back in October 2021. It was because I had heard the Word of God spoken to me the weeks prior to that day as I sat in the main sessions at WOW. The teaching was on what we receive as a part of our “inheritance” when we dwell in God’s New Kingdom as His child. I heard how God wanted the eyes of my heart to be enlightened so that I could know the hope for which He had called me, “the riches of his glorious inheritance…” (Ephesians 1:18) I heard “the Word of Christ,” that was being spoken, took it into my heart, and it began to strengthen my faith.

Perhaps as you read these words you are experiencing a longing within you for more? The Word of Christ is speaking to you and inviting you to live a life of faith that responds to the Word of God. You may wonder, how do I respond to the Word? We must receive His Word through reading it and listening to it carefully with our spiritual ears. We must diligently study His Word, hiding it in our hearts, the Word that works within us a mighty faith if we hold firmly to what we have heard. It will trust that God will do what He has promised because He is faithful.  

God has given each of us a small deposit of faith and the opportunity to receive His Word so it will grow and mature and become established. I can testify that this is true because of that morning in October of 2021. That little seed of faith deposited within me when I had received Jesus as my personal Savior was growing as I retained it and believed it. As I have acted upon the Word I have heard over and over, that faith has grown more and more. God has been at work in me through His Word and faith. Today I am free. I am dwelling in God and His peace! What He has done for me He will do for you. His Word is speaking. Hear it, receive it, and act upon it in faith!  

This week’s song is “Take You at Your Word” by Cody Carnes and Benjamine William Hastings. May it be a reminder that God will do what He says He will do in His Word. As we receive it, we can live a life of faith!

Love,

Janet Nelson, Devoted and Determined

https://www.wowjcmo.com/

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We Stand Between Two Offers

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Make no mistake about it, we were made to receive. We will accept what is offered to us by one of two choices what God gives freely to us or what the world gives with a price we cannot afford to pay. To not choose God will by default be a choice to receive from the world. We will either know God in intimate relationship, or we will know the world and its ways in a destructive relationship with it, being shaped by its influence and receiving only what it gives.

Jesus spoke of the choice that we all must make and the fruits of that choice:

”“I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”“ John 16:33 NIV
”The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have life and have it abundantly.“ John 10:10 ESV

Jesus offers us a life filled with peace and life. The world offers us a life of trouble far from the relationship with our Creator, God, for which we are designed. What the world offers us will steal from us and destroy us. Ultimately it will kill us. Anything short of a living in a vibrant relationship with God is a life filled with death, darkness, and destruction.

It is important to take a look at what you are experiencing in your life. We can see that God created us for experience. He gave us our senses to hear, see, touch, taste and smell. He also has given us our spiritual senses to understand and know the things we cannot with our five outward senses. What are you experiencing within yourself? What you are experiencing reflects who you are receiving from.

If your life is a life of turmoil within— anger, anxiety, bitterness, fear, etc. You are being robbed from. You are being destroyed. Your connection with God is at the very least clogged, if not non existent making it impossible to receive from your loving Creator, God.

If your life is a life of peace, joy, and love. You are connected and receiving from God. You are experiencing a close relationship with the giver of all good things.

We have been given a choice of whom we will receive from. May our hearts long for a pure and free flowing connection to the one who generously gives life to those who will receive it, Jesus!

“Jesus Have It All”

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Today is a very special day for me. After many years of being held captive by anxiety and trying many things to get free, God heard my cry for freedom and set me free. After 6 years on anxiety meds, I no longer needed them. Two years ago on this date was my first day of freedom from taking both Prozac and Buspar.

God has worked a change in my life, and for those of you who know me, it may be a bit of a surprise for me to tell you this. Because I have always been active in church and made it no secret that I believed in Jesus. In fact, I have thought throughout my adult years that I was living my life surrendered to God. The truth is In some ways I was, but in many ways I was not.
‘Make no mistake, God wants all of us.

About 5 months prior to taking my last anxiety pill I was at a revival service at my church with Pastor Denbow speaking (October 2021). He was speaking about “syncretism”- trying to mix the gospel with the worlds ways. In that service I realized that I had been trying to mix secular humanist thought and practices, as well as the widely accepted practice of eastern meditation, with the Bible. That does not work! In my love for God, He does not want to compete with me having other “spiritual” lovers — my ways or the worlds. He wants all of me, all of my heart— entirely, totally, and completely given up to Him. This is Teachings that the Bible Study group WOW has helped me to come to understand better and better through the past few years. (God has used WOW tremendously in my life to help me walk in freedom)

At that revival 2 1/2 years ago, I went to the front and repented for the sin I had held in my heart, and told God He could have all of me. On a morning, shortly after that I went to my pill box and heard the Holy Spirit tell me “that is not your inheritance.” I quit one medicine instantly. The other one I weaned off and took my last pill almost 5 months later.

Two years later to this day, I am free! The change in me since that time has been huge. So much so that I have told my friends, “I feel like I have been born again…again.”

Friday night I was talking to my husband, his brother, and my sister in law about this change. I said it almost makes you think about getting baptized again. I didn’t think I needed to since I was baptized as a teenager.
Saturday morning I woke up with the desire to be baptized burning within my heart.

So tonight, I am going to be baptized. I want to publicly declare that I have been changed by Jesus and His power alone. I want to do whatever He tells me to do. Because He is life. And I do not want my way of doing things ever again. They have died. I am raised to new life.

Jesus have it all!

Slave to Sin… Caught in Anxieties Grip — WOW Devotion February 29, 2024

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“I am using an example from everyday life because of your human limitations. Just as you used to offer yourselves as slaves to impurity and to ever-increasing wickedness, so now offer yourselves as slaves to righteousness leading to holiness. When you were slaves to sin, you were free from the control of righteousness. What benefit did you reap at that time from the things you are now ashamed of? Those things result in death! But now that you have been set free from sin and have become slaves to God, the benefit you reap leads to holiness, and the result is eternal life.”  
Romans‬ ‭6‬:‭19‬-‭22‬ ‭NIV‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬

For several years, I lived my life subjected to the cruel taskmaster of anxiety. It ruled over my life. Anxiety dictated my daily routine: Get out of bed. Take your first anxiety pill of the day: Do your daily exercise of Eastern Meditation on Headspace. Now start your day. Throughout the day anxiety would exercise its control over my feelings and emotions. Time to do breathing techniques, practice mindfulness, engage in the 5,4,3,2,1 method, then repeat. Often, I could not shake the feelings of a tight throat and a tight chest. Then it was time for my evening anxiety pill. I crawled into bed. I hoped for a night free of an anxious awakening at 2 am, lying awake for hours, and experiencing what I did in the day. This scenario was repeated day after day, night after night. I was a slave to my sin of anxiety. I was subject to its control, and it was producing death, darkness, and destruction inside of me.

Our verses this week are once again about holiness. This holiness is a benefit as we live our lives as “slaves to righteousness.” It is a life of freedom from sin as we live our lives set apart for His sacred use – a life of love, faith, holiness, and prayer. In this life, we are “slaves to God,” under His control and His rule. This submission to Him is always for our benefit, because He is a good Lord and Master. Being His slave results in more than holiness. Through it we experience “eternal life.”

Three years ago, I learned that we were created to serve someone. The words of this verse were proved true in my life. I came to understand that I had a choice. I could continue to “offer the parts of my body in slavery to impurity and ever-increasing wickedness” that the sin of anxiety was producing, or I could become a “slave to God.” I would either serve an evil master of sin or our loving and Holy God. I could not serve them both. I had to choose. This is the truth for each and every one of us. To not choose God is to choose the enemy.

God is holy. He is perfectly and impeccably pure, completely immaculate, and uncompromisingly righteous and just. He desires for us to be in relationship with Him, but in order for us to be close to Him, we must be holy as He is holy. To do so, we must “offer ourselves as slaves to righteousness.” The benefit we receive is a pure heart and freedom from sin and sinful affections, conformed to the image of God. We will be holy and the “result will be eternal life” with Him.

As you have read the words above, have you become aware that you are a “slave to impurity?”  Is there an addiction or a sin that keeps you from experiencing a close relationship with God and the freedom from sin that He alone gives? God desires for us to live our lives surrendered to Him as a “slave to righteousness” that will lead to holiness. He desires us to be close to Him in a relationship of intimacy filled with His goodness, joy, peace, and love. We can only experience this when we live our lives fully surrendered to Him!

Our song this week is once again by Charity Gayle, “Because of Jesus.” Because of what Jesus has done, we can know that we are finally free of the sin that destroys! He has redeemed us and made us holy as He is holy. May our hearts desire to serve Him in complete obedience to His Word. May we live as His “slaves to righteousness” which leads to holiness – holiness in heart and in everything we do!

Love,

Janet

https://www.wowjcmo.com/

https://mailchi.mp/wowjcmo/wow-devotion-john-6219253?e=6c56f70e45

Noise Warfare

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A few months ago, I was praying. I heard the Holy Spirit tell me, “Janet, do you know that Satan uses noise warfare?” Since the term “noise warfare” was not exactly on my mind, I decided to do a google search. When I did, I found an article about Manuel Noriega. The implications of his story have been eye opening to me as one who has been subject to “noise warfare” for most of my life.

US Soldiers blaring rock and roll music in 1989

On Christmas Day 1989, The United States decided it was time to arrest and bring to justice General Manuel Noriega, the dictator of Panama. Indicted for drug trafficking charges, Mr. Noriega had holed himself up in the embassy of the Vatican in Panama. The US forces did not want to destroy buildings in order to accomplish a surrender of the surrounded General. So, they engaged in “noise warfare”. They surrounded the Embassy and with a flight of Humvees that were mounted with loudspeakers from which they blasted rock in roll music, nonstop for three days. Noriega, who loved classical music surrendered shortly after. As I read the news report of the events surrounding Noriega’s surrender, the truth set in. This is the exact type of spiritual warfare I have been engaged in most of my life.

Make no doubt about it. Our enemy, Satan, is a liar. Not only is he a liar, he takes great pleasure in repeating lies in our ears over and over and over again. His voice does not tire from spewing lies 24/7 that lead us to choose anxiety, anger, depression, hatred, bitterness, envy, selfishness, jealousy, etc. However, we do not have to be subject to the noise warfare going on within our heads.

About three years ago, I contacted my friend from college. In our conversation, I revealed to her that I was suffering from horrible anxiety. She told me something that to this day rings true, “Janet, you have the Holy Spirit living within you. You know His voice. All you have to do is listen.” It occurred to me that moment that I had listened to the lies of the enemy so long that I had forgotten what it was like to listen for the “still small voice” of the Holy Spirit. I had allowed Satan to shout in my ears and I had been internalizing his lies. It was time to draw a line in the sand and FIGHT!

Do you know that God has a victory plan for the “noise warfare” of our enemy? It is the praise of our glorious God! It silences Satan!

“Lord, our Lord, how majestic is your name in all the earth! You have set your glory
in the heavens. Through the praise of children and infants you have established a stronghold against your enemies, to silence the foe and the avenger. “ Psalm 8:1-2 NIV

We must make a determined effort to use this weapon we have graciously been given. Satan knows this is true. So he once again will shout his lies, “That won’t work! You look like an idiot praising when you are who you are!” May I encourage you, tell him to “shut it!” and then get your praise on!

Even if the praise you struggle to get out starts with a feeble, “I praise you God, because you are good.” Build on those words with more and more praise. He cannot continue to blare his noise when the praises start! The truth of who God is as you praise Him with His Word will prevail! So, praise and then listen. You will hear His voice. It has been gently speaking all along. In Him is the Victory!

I have rediscovered the past few years how beautiful the sound of God’s voice is! I love it! What I did not know as I listened to the noise of the enemy is that God’s voice was speaking the whole time. Praise helped me to turn the channel of what was being broadcasted in my head. God’s voice is loving. His voice is peace. It is gentle, kind, patient, and good. And best of all, it can be heard! In fact, God longs for us to hear it! He wants us to know His voice and follow no other! Because He loves us and wants what is best for us!

We do not have to live under the constant barrage of the enemy’s lies and his “noise warfare”! We must immerse ourselves in the truth- God’s Word, the Bible, and lift up our voices in praise! Our God still breaks the chains of torment off of the minds of His children! Believe it is so!

Free and In My Right Mind! Mark 5:1-10

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I love this account of Jesus setting the man free from many demons that tormented him. This man lived away from his family in a graveyard and was deeply tormented. The people tried to subdue him but he broke the chains they used and was violent.

But NO Mental torment by the demonic is too big for Jesus. With a word Jesus cast them out. This is what I love about the story: 

“When they came to Jesus, they saw the man who had been possessed by the legion of demons, sitting there, dressed and in his right mind; and they were afraid.” Mark 5:15 NIV

This man had a reputation for being CRAZY! But when Jesus stepped in he was freed from the demonic spirits that tormented him. He was in his right mind!

Around three years ago I was living a life tormented by anxiety and fear. I had been for years. I tried everything I could think of to fix it until I came to the end of me and my ways letting God do it. Jesus stepped in and He has set me free! Although I haven’t ran around a graveyard naked and cut myself with stones like this man(For that we can all thank God), I know what it felt like to have my mind out of control. Now I testify to you I know what it is like to sit at the feet of Jesus free from that torment and in my right mind! Jesus is the same yesterday, today, and forever! He still changes us and sets us free from torment when we come to Him!

That is Good News!!!

“Hell lost another one! I am free!!”

Reflections on John 10: Follow His Voice!

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At the height of the struggle I had with anxiety, verses 4-5 spoke to me.

“To him the gatekeeper opens. The sheep hear his voice, and he calls his own sheep by name and leads them out. When he has brought out all his own, he goes before them, and the sheep follow him, for they know his voice. A stranger they will not follow, but they will flee from him, for they do not know the voice of strangers.””
‭‭John‬ ‭10‬:‭3‬-‭5‬ ‭ESV‬‬

Anxiety, among many other voices, cry out for our attention, but Jesus assures us that as His sheep we know HIS voice! If we really stop and listen, we can hear that voice. All the other voices shouting at us for His attention are only thieves and strangers. We as His sheep follow His voice alone.

Do not be distracted by all the shouting of lies in your ears! The truth is, when you are in Jesus, you know His voice. If you listen, you will hear it. Follow that voice! It leads to the one who tenderly cares for all our needs, our Good Shepherd.

“I Will Rise”

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Every once in a while, a memory of hard, traumatic, unexplainable events of the past will raise its ugly head inside of me. It tends to rock me to the core. Sometimes taking a while to get my mind off of it.

Today I was reading in Luke 24:1-12. It is the account of Mary Magdalene, Joanna, and Mary Mother of James going to the tomb of Jesus to put burial spices on His body. They find He isn’t there. Suddenly, Angels appear and one says “Why do you look for the living among the dead?” This phrase resounds in my heart today. The women had seen some of the most traumatic events of a brutal death of a loved one. They surely were processing what had happened trying to make sense. But they were instructed that there wasn’t anything there for them in the dead things of the past. Jesus was living! He wasn’t in the past He has risen!

Whatever we have walked through that was hard, painful, and death to us is not where Jesus is. He has risen!! He is not in the dead things of the past. He is alive now and forever more!

The song “I Will Rise” by Bethel has been on my play list this week. This morning has been a morning that I have it on repeat. It speaks of what I read in Luke. 

“Beyond the burial, there's a resurrection
Your will be done in me
Oh-oh, Let my roots go deep
And I will rise, I will rise
He holds the time that I will rise”

Jesus calls us out of our graves of the past to stand in the present with Him! “I will Rise! God through my life be lifted high!” We have no time to be looking intently into the graves of our lives! Jesus is not there! The living life of Christ cannot be found in the graves of failure and pain! He is risen and we are seated with Him in the heavenly places of His victorious Kingdom! I will rise! Let Jesus rise in me!

Dangerous Prayers

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I’m not sure when it started, the drift. My best guess is 5 years ago, maybe more.. That’s why it’s called a drift. You just slowly give up on or slowly release your determination to believe one way and shift another way. Then all of a sudden you wake up and realize you’re not where you used to be spiritually. Those around you may not even know you’ve been evolving slowly because you’ve been looking for and developing reasons to justify your unbelief.

My drift has stopped! Thank God! The past couple of years God has pulled me out of it and set me back on course. But every once and awhile I find myself thinking like I did when I was adrift. God has been faithful to point out “Is that really the truth?” To me over and over.

The past few weeks my eyes have been opened to another area I had let drift away- a desire to listen to the Holy Spirit’s direction, to hunger for Him to show me His will, and the earnest prayer for Him to fill me full of Him. I had put them in a file in my head called “Dangerous Prayers”.

In my mind “Dangerous Prayers” were… well… dangerous. Dangerous because it would require me to step out in faith as opposed to hovering in the shadows of fear. Dangerous because I would have to let go of my plans, my choices, and my will and obey God. That’s the irony of it all “Dangerous Prayers” are dangerous to a heart that wants to drift. Because once you pray them, sincerely and from the heart you are no longer drifting and flirting with unbelief.

“Dangerous Prayers” are really only dangerous to one person, our enemy, Satan. Our enemy knows the moment we sincerely pray from our heart to the Holy Spirit asking Him to fill us full of Him and to make us sensitive to His voice with a heart of sincere obedience, his plans for our demise are done. No wonder the enemy wants us to believe that prayers of surrender are dangerous!

Maybe it’s just me the enemy tries this on, but I bet it’s not. He tries to convince me that if I pray “Dangerous Prayers” then he will put me in his crosshairs and aim his firey darts more frequently. I assure you as one who has been there and done that, this could not be any more false. His attacks are relentless no matter if you cower in a corner afraid to pray or stand boldly declaring God’s Word and His Power. All the more reason to pray the “dangerous prayers”. The only safe place to be is “IN THE LORD our refuge and fortress”, and the best way to get there is to pray the “Dangerous Prayers”. Prayers for the Holy Spirit to help me to hear, obey, and abide in His presence alone are the only safe place to be. They are prayers of safety for the believer. But dangerous to our enemy.

I’ve discovered a pretty good rule of thumb to operate in here lately. If I hear a fearful voice shouting that praying sincerely from my heart, “I want the Holy Spirit to lead me in every area of my life” is dangerous because… “What will God make you do…” Then DUH… PRAY IT! That’s just another “Dangerous Prayer” that needs to be prayed. Why would I not want to follow the only voice that promises to lead me in “Paths of Righteousness for His names sake” i.e., “Good paths/ Peaceful ones” the voice of the One who promises a “Future and a Hope” for me? So, when I hear the lying voice say, “Don’t pray that! That’s a Dangerous Prayer!” May my reply be, “Well thank you for the reminder I believe I will.”

Unhooked- Freedom from Painful Memories

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I grew up in a small southern Missouri town near Montauk State Park, a state park known for trout fishing. Opening day of Trout Season, March 1st was almost like a holiday in our area. Kids were known to skip school so they could be on the river, pole in hand, listening for the early morning whistle blow that signaled the day of trout fishing had begun. I didn’t go much, but some in my family did. Then I met my husband and we married. He took to the whole trout fishing scene and became pretty proficient in catching his limit of trout, almost every time. That is not easy. I could fish for hours and catch none….. Years went by, camping at another state park for trout fishing became a yearly, if not more occurrence. It was nice. We had a pull behind camper. I would sleep in with the kids, he would go fishing. I would hang out, relax, do some school work with them, since we tended to camp during the school year, perks of Homeschooling… Then the camper was sold, the kids grew up, and my husband needed a fishing buddy. So my love for trout fishing began.

A small hook can do a lot of damage in a trout’s life.

One of the things about catching trout that still stumps me to this day, is they are incredibly smart. They can see the line, if too thick, the hook if too big, and they will NOT bite on it. You use a very light weight line and a very small hook considering the size of fish you will reel in.

This morning the image of a large trout being reeled in on a small hook has been floating around in my mind. I’ve seen it lots of times as I’ve stood with waders on, in the stream. Fish in one hand, my other hand free to remove the tiny hook from its mouth. How I ever got it into my net on such a small device eludes me. It probably amazes the trout as well. One chomp at an alluring fly and it’s a done deal, with the right skills, he becomes mine.

There is a parallel between the trout on a hook and the thought life I have struggled with for years. But finally, something has clicked inside of me that has “unhooked me” in my mind, and all I can do is praise the God who sets me free.

I’m pretty sure any person who struggles with trauma-based anxiety will identify with this pattern in your mind. A thought of an event or situation of the past comes to mind, a trauma. Then the thought, “uh oh… I thought the thought. I remembered the event. I prayed about that memory. I asked God to take it away, but here it is. I must not have experienced the healing God promises. What can I do to set myself free?” So, YOU fight to not think about it anymore: Distract, medicate, meditate, self-help techniques galore, the list goes on… That is the equivalent to a large trout hooked on a tiny hook. That trout will FIGHT to not be reeled in. All the while digging the hook deeper into its lip.

Yesterday, the Bible study group I go to, “Women on Wednesdays” had a workshop on Emotional Woundedness. They invited the Reginal director for Center for Women’s Ministries to lead it. There was something talked about during the workshop that has “unhooked” me, “Holy Forgetfulness”. God must have been trying to get my attention, because not only did it come up during the workshop, the topic was brought up in church on Sunday by a guest speaker for Spring Revival, and it also came up on a teaching I watched online by Robert Morris. In fact, a quote from Robert Morris’ teaching was posted in my Facebook feed. “Holy forgetfulness doesn’t mean we won’t have the memory anymore; it means we won’t have the stress and pain associated with the memory.” I would venture to say God has been trying to get my attention. It hit me… Memories of painful events don’t just vanish. They happened. But fighting the memory by trying to forget will only “set the hook” worse. God has “unhooked” me! Satan wants to drag up the chains, the handcuffs, the prison cell bars, from the recesses of my mind and say, “Yep, they are still there…” But the fact of the matter is NOT that all those things have existed as a part of my story. The FACT is I am not in them anymore! The pain they caused me has been healed. I am free! Jesus, the healer and the source of freedom, has unhooked me! That memory that I have tried so hard to forget needs to only be filed away under the label, “YOU ARE FREE!” and each time it may come up, the label clearly displayed. Because that memory has no hold on me!